Real-life advice from a real-life recruiter

Archive for June, 2015

Know thyself…

Hello fellow followers!

Many people live in peaceful ignorance of themselves and their needs, others not wanting to know for fear of what they would have to address. After reading an article by Emotional Health Expert Elaine Sihera, I thought we’d all find value in understanding ourselves. Below you’ll find her POV on why knowing yourself is so important for the following three reasons:

First, you have to live with yourself 24/7. No one in your life will be with you as much as you are with yourself. Would you live with a stranger for so long without knowing anything about them? Really, it is about self-awareness. Who you are, what you like and want, where you are going, what makes you happy and what makes you irritated. Those are very vital things to know if you are to improve the quality of your life and benefit from the things which make you happiest.

Second, self-awareness builds confidence. The more you know about you, the greater you will feel emotionally and the more adept you will become at dealing with situations. You then become more intuitive about what works for you and what doesn’t. Self-awareness is a powerful tool for improving competence because you will be pushed along directions which make you feel good rather than living in a vague way from day to day, not knowing how you feel or what you should do.

Finally, self-awareness boosts identity. If you don’t know much about your background, history, culture, gender and what you value, how will you get on with others in mutual respect? They cannot respect what they don’t understand. People who lack self-awareness tend to be ambiguous and make others feel uncomfortable because they are never sure what to do. So ignorance about the self is not a good thing

What is the first step of getting to know me?

The first step to getting to know you would be-asks questions. Just as you would with anything topic or person that you’d like to know a little better, do the same for yourself. Here are a few starter questions that you can begin to ask that will provoke so thought.

  • When do I have the most energy? Day or Night.
  • What makes me happy?
  • What makes me unhappy?
  • Do I like to work with people?
  • Am I energetic?
  • What do I do really well?
  • What do I like about myself?
  • Am I pessimistic or optimistic?
  • What’s my best quality?
  • What’s my worst quality?
  • What do I not like about myself?
  • What is my motto?
  • What’s my biggest worry?

“He who knows others is wise; he who knows himself is enlightened.” ― Lao Tzu

Guide to disagreeing

Have you ever disagreed with someone and were unsure of how to verbalize your thoughts without creating a full-on heated debate? Check these tips and suggestions on how to disagree agreeably.

Rules for Disagreeing:

  • Use good voice tone
  •  Pick your battles. “You do not have to address every injustice or irritation that comes along,” says Harriet Lerner, author of The Dance of Anger.
  • Understand the stakes. Even if you think that you know the other person’s issues, it can’t hurt to pose a direct question. Ask “what’s your real concern here?’ ” says Rebecca Zucker, cofounder of Next Step Partners, an executive-coaching and leadership-development firm in San Francisco.
  • Don’t interrogate. Try not to go on a lawyerlike attack with a listing of yes-or-no questions. This tack is aggressive, puts the other person on the defensive and can make them feel belittled.
  • Use good body language 
  • Listen to the other person’s opinion.

Phrases to use when disagreeing…

  • Have you thought about it this way?
  • Well, I was looking at it differently.
  • Why don’t you look at that again?
  • How about looking at it from another angle?
  • That doesn’t quite sound right to me.
  • I don’t agree with that idea.
  • I disagree.