Hello fellow followers!
Many people live in peaceful ignorance of themselves and their needs, others not wanting to know for fear of what they would have to address. After reading an article by Emotional Health Expert Elaine Sihera, I thought we’d all find value in understanding ourselves. Below you’ll find her POV on why knowing yourself is so important for the following three reasons:
First, you have to live with yourself 24/7. No one in your life will be with you as much as you are with yourself. Would you live with a stranger for so long without knowing anything about them? Really, it is about self-awareness. Who you are, what you like and want, where you are going, what makes you happy and what makes you irritated. Those are very vital things to know if you are to improve the quality of your life and benefit from the things which make you happiest.
Second, self-awareness builds confidence. The more you know about you, the greater you will feel emotionally and the more adept you will become at dealing with situations. You then become more intuitive about what works for you and what doesn’t. Self-awareness is a powerful tool for improving competence because you will be pushed along directions which make you feel good rather than living in a vague way from day to day, not knowing how you feel or what you should do.
Finally, self-awareness boosts identity. If you don’t know much about your background, history, culture, gender and what you value, how will you get on with others in mutual respect? They cannot respect what they don’t understand. People who lack self-awareness tend to be ambiguous and make others feel uncomfortable because they are never sure what to do. So ignorance about the self is not a good thing
What is the first step of getting to know me?
The first step to getting to know you would be-asks questions. Just as you would with anything topic or person that you’d like to know a little better, do the same for yourself. Here are a few starter questions that you can begin to ask that will provoke so thought.
- When do I have the most energy? Day or Night.
- What makes me happy?
- What makes me unhappy?
- Do I like to work with people?
- Am I energetic?
- What do I do really well?
- What do I like about myself?
- Am I pessimistic or optimistic?
- What’s my best quality?
- What’s my worst quality?
- What do I not like about myself?
- What is my motto?
- What’s my biggest worry?
“He who knows others is wise; he who knows himself is enlightened.” ― Lao Tzu
Have you ever disagreed with someone and were unsure of how to verbalize your thoughts without creating a full-on heated debate? Check these tips and suggestions on how to disagree agreeably.
Rules for Disagreeing:
- Use good voice tone
- Pick your battles. “You do not have to address every injustice or irritation that comes along,” says Harriet Lerner, author of The Dance of Anger.
- Understand the stakes. Even if you think that you know the other person’s issues, it can’t hurt to pose a direct question. Ask “what’s your real concern here?’ ” says Rebecca Zucker, cofounder of Next Step Partners, an executive-coaching and leadership-development firm in San Francisco.
- Don’t interrogate. Try not to go on a lawyerlike attack with a listing of yes-or-no questions. This tack is aggressive, puts the other person on the defensive and can make them feel belittled.
- Use good body language
- Listen to the other person’s opinion.
Phrases to use when disagreeing…
- Have you thought about it this way?
- Well, I was looking at it differently.
- Why don’t you look at that again?
- How about looking at it from another angle?
- That doesn’t quite sound right to me.
- I don’t agree with that idea.
- I disagree.
Hello fellow followers! We have all dealt with negative emotions in our professional and personal lives, but did you know smiling has many benefits?
Check out the below cool facts about smiling from the pickthebrain.com
- Smiles are contagious: It’s not just a saying: smiling really is contagious, scientists say. In a study conducted in Sweden, people had difficulty frowning when they looked at other subjects who were smiling, and their muscles twitched into smiles all on their own.
- Smiles Relieve Stress: Your body immediately releases endorphins when you smile, even when you force it. This sudden change in mood will help you feel better and release stress.
- It’s easier to smile than to frown: Scientists have discovered that your body has to work harder and use more muscles to frown than it does to smile.
- It’s a universal sign of happiness: While hand shakes, hugs, and bows all have varying meanings across cultures, smiling is known around the world and in all cultures as a sign of happiness and acceptance.
- Smiling helps you get promoted: Smiles make a person seem more attractive, sociable and confident, and people who smile more are more likely to get a promotion.
Hello Fellow Followers…
Have you ever gone to a social event in order to meet new people, network, or perhaps build a more robust social life? Of course you have!!! And call me psychic but I also know that you’ve had those very awkward moments where you’ve been cornered by a conversation hog or quite frankly don’t know how to gracefully exit the conversation and begin another for fear of coming across rude.
Well worry no more! Check out these exit statements that will help you ease discussion departures and politely remove yourself from the occasional “conversation hog”.
Graceful exit statements
- “It’s been really nice talking to you” or “It was nice meeting you”
If someone says that to you say “Thanks, I enjoyed it too”…and move on
- “You’ll have to excuse me, I spotted my friend from across the room and I want to make sure I say hello. It’s been really nice talking with you, have a great night!”
- “Maybe I’ll run into you later” or “Maybe we can pick up this discussion later” if you want to circle back to talk to them again.
Other reasons to leave:
- You need to feed the parking meter.
- You need to step outside to make a phone call.
- You need to get another drink.
- You need to visit the bathroom.
- You need to ask so-and-so a question.
Don’t worry if your reason is a white lie. You may not actually need to use the restroom when you excuse yourself. That’s ok. Go to the rest room, wash your hands, collect yourself, and when you come out find yourself a new conversational partner.
It’s not a question. You’re not asking permission to leave; you’re informing that you’re leaving. So state “So nice talking with you! I need to excuse myself. If I don’t talk to you later, enjoy the party” and then walk away.
If the person doesn’t take the hint, you can escalate/interrupt. “I’m so sorry to cut you off, but I need to step away for a moment. Maybe we’ll pick this up later!” and then leave the area.
See you at the top!
Hello Fellow Followers…It’s no secret that the work can be tough. Check out the following tips of retention…
- Take a personal interest. Learning about your staff shows you care about them as individuals, not just as employees. That bond can influence their loyalty to your establishment and creates a since of family. One way to do this would be schedule a group time where you and your employees can sit and share things other than work- It builds relationship and camaraderie J
- Provide tools to do the job. From proper equipment to training new staff, employees experience less stress when you set them up to do their jobs well and they become empowered to make decisions and knowledgeable .
- Offer recognition. Employees want to know their hard work matters. Take a second during a team meeting to mention one of your employees who recently received a customer compliment or a line crew that performed particularly well on a busy night. Who doesn’t like to be in the spotlight for all the right reasons?
v Encourage communication. Wouldn’t you agree that we all should know where we stand with our leadership. By regularly communicating, leadership and employees can better understand one another and quickly resolve issues. Feedback is a learning tool that encourages growth and you’d be surprised at how you’d also find out other talents they may have.
Hello Fellow followers!
Did you know that bullying not only occurs in schools and homes but also at work? – Yes work!
So how does this happen? Well according to Times Business and Money magazine authors- Bullying in the workplace continues because the leadership of the company often isn’t aware of their behavior, either because it goes unreported (many victims are too frightened or embarrassed to draw attention to their plight) or because the bullies are good at masking their behavior and/or fooling their superiors.
Many bullies are very socially skilled, and use their bullying behavior strategically to coerce others into providing them the resources needed to achieve their work-related objectives.
Facts about Bullying on the job -The workplace bullying Institute survey
- 50% of Americans have not experienced or witnessed bullying, but 35% have been bullied; 15% have witnessed bullying.
- Bosses comprise 72% of bullies.
- More men (62%) are bullies and women are the most frequent targets of bullies (58%).
- Women bullies target other women (80%).
- Up to 81% of employers are perceived as doing nothing and resisting taking action when targets of bullying fill out a survey. In the general public, only 44.8% perceive the employers as doing nothing.
- 45% of people targeted by a bully experience stress-related health problems including debilitating anxiety, panic attacks, and clinical depression (39%).
Types of bullying behaviors:
- Exhibiting condescending behavior that puts people on edge and makes them unable to function professionally
- Physical threatening others
- Intimidating others
How to stop bullying in the workplace?
- Describe the behavior you see the bully exhibiting – don’t edit or offer opinions, just describe what you see. ie (You regularly enter my cubicle, lean over my shoulder, and read my personal correspondence on my computer screen.)
- Tell the bully exactly how his/her behavior is impacting your work. (Because much of my work is confidential, these actions make me feel as if I need to hide what I am working on from you, or change a screen which is a waste of my time.)
Remember you want to be strategic when engaging the bully BUT you also want them to know that you will stand your ground if they continue to challenge you after you’ve addressed the disruptive behavior.
Hello fellow followers, did you know that having sharp interviewing skills is important to you landing the job. But did you also know that asking the wrong questions can lead to your interviewer questioning your candidacy? Take a look at the top five questions to NOT to ask in your first interview…
1.) How soon do you promote employees?
“An individual asking this question may come off as arrogant and entitled,” says recruiter Josh Tolan of SparkHire.com.
2.) Questions that start with “why?”
Why? It’s a matter of psychology. These kinds of questions put people on the defensive, says Kohut. She advises repositioning a question such as, “Why did the company lay off people last year?” to a less confrontational, “I read about the layoffs you had. What’s your opinion on how the company is positioned for the future?”
3.) “Who is your competition?”
This is a great example of a question that could either make you sound thoughtful … or totally backfire and reveal that you did zero research about the company prior to the interview, says Jacqui Barrett-Poindexter of CareerTrend.net. Before asking any question, determine whether it’s something you could have figured out yourself through a Google search. If it is, a) don’t ask it and b) do that Google search before your interview!
4.) “How often do reviews occur?”
Maybe you’re concerned about the company’s view of your performance, or maybe you’re just curious, but nix any questions about the company’s review or self-appraisal policies. “It makes us think you’re concerned with how often negative feedback might be delivered,” says Kohut. Keep your confidence intact, and avoid the topic altogether–or at least until you receive an offer.
5.) “May I arrive early or leave late as long as I get my hours in?”
Even if you make it clear that you’re hoping for a flexible schedule to accommodate a legitimate concern such as picking up your kids from daycare, Barrett-Poindexter advises against this question. “While work-life balance is a very popular concern right now, it’s not the most pressing consideration for a hiring decision-maker,” she says. “Insinuating early on that you’re concerned about balancing your life may indicate to your employer that you are more concerned about your needs and less concerned about the company’s.